Losing loved ones or family members is often a pivotal moment in someone's life filled with grief and sorrow; sending heartfelt condolence messages to convey your deepest sympathy is not always easy.
It is often difficult to find the right words to write in a sympathy card or say when you see the grieving person at home or the funeral.
How can I show my deepest sympathy and support to my loved ones?
A grieving loved one might appreciate knowing they are not alone and that someone is thinking of them or keeping them in their prayers. You can express condolence to show them that you are willing to support them if they need you.
Sending a text message might seem slightly impersonal. But sending a text message can convey your sympathy while allowing the person to read and respond to your condolence message if and when they are ready.
You could phone someone to convey your heartfelt sympathy or condolences. This is slightly more personal than sending a text. Bear in mind that the person may not want to speak to anyone. But, on the other hand, they might welcome the chance to speak to someone.
Grieving is often a private experience, and some people might not want to have visitors. However, some people find comfort when they are surrounded by people who care for them. You can visit someone who has recently lost a loved one if you are close to them and have arranged it in advance.
Bringing a prepared meal or helping with chores is a thoughtful way to express condolences when you visit someone who is grieving. You could also offer to run some errands so that they don't need to think about getting specific tasks done.
Sending even short condolence messages is more personal than a text message while giving the person space and time to grieve. You could combine a sincere condolence card with a care package or gift basket, like Spoonful of Comfort's packages.
What to say instead of "thoughts and prayers?"
Knowing what to say to someone who has recently lost a loved one is challenging. It's easy to promise to send a prayer, but beyond that, you might struggle to find another word of solace. Desperately wanting to ease the person's pain but worried that you might say something that makes the situation worse. Read here to find out what to say when someone dies.
Because of this, we often try to avoid speaking of the person who had passed, thinking that bringing them up will remind their loved ones that they are no longer with us.
Often speaking of the lost loved one is a way to bring some comfort to someone who is grieving their loss. It is a way to connect and remember the lost loved one. When someone is mourning, it might help them process their grief by speaking and hearing about their loved one.
What is a good scripture for condolences?
Sometimes it could help to include scripture or religious sympathy quotes in your heartfelt sympathy message. It could help a loved one to be reminded of God's love during this difficult time.
Here are some sympathy Bible verses on grief that you can include when conveying your sincere sympathy:
- Joshua 1:9 - Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."
- Psalms 23:4 - Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
- Psalms 30:2 - O Lord my God, I called to you for help and you healed me.
- Psalm 34:18 - The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
- Psalms 119:50 - My comfort in my suffering is this: your promise preserves my life.
- Psalm 147:3 - He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
- Isaiah 57:1-2 - The righteous perish, and no one takes it to heart; the devout are taken away, and no one understands that the righteous are taken away to be spared from evil. Those who walk uprightly enter into peace; they find rest as they lie in death.
- Isaiah 58:9 - Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
- Matthew 5:4 - Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
- Matthew 11:28-30 - Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you...My yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
- Luke 6:21 - Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh.
- John 16:22 - Therefore, you too have grief now; but I will see you again, and your heart will rejoice, and no one will take your joy away from you.
- Romans 8:28 - And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
- 1 Thessalonians 4:13-14 - Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.
- 1 Thessalonians 4:17-18 - After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage one another with these words.
- 2 Thessalonians 3:16 - Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way.
And messages of peace from the Buddha…
- “Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely.”
- “The world is afflicted by death and decay. But the wise do not grieve, having realized the nature of the world.”
- “Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.”
…the Quran…
- And [God] shall heal the breast of the believers. (at-Tawba, 9:14)
- Mankind there has come to you a guidance from your Lord and a healing for (the diseases) in your hearts, and for those who believe a guidance and a mercy.
..and the Bhagavad Gita:
- All beings are unmanifest, or invisible to our physical eyes, before birth and after death. They manifest between the birth and the death only. What is there to grieve about? (2.28)
- Weapons do not cut this Spirit, fire does not burn it, water does not make it wet, and the wind does not make it dry. The Spirit cannot be cut, burned, wet, or dried. It is eternal, all-pervading, changeless, immovable, and primeval. Atma is beyond space and time. (2.23-24)
What is the best way to show meaningful and genuine love or support?
Grief could consume someone who is mourning. They may find it difficult to complete everyday tasks. You can show them that you love and support them and convey your sincere condolences through actions and taking care of tasks around the house. It is best to ask before doing something. When you ask, be specific instead of general and vague.
Someone who recently lost a loved one might be overwhelmed by their emotions and have little capacity to think about what needs to be done. Instead, try offering to do something specific, like making dinner or going to get some groceries.
Other things you could help with include doing the yard or housework, offering to drive the mourners around, or giving out-of-town guests a place to stay for a few nights if you can. I
You could also assist in making funeral arrangements. One should always approach this with sensitivity and tact.
Spoonful of Comfort is here to help!
Spoonful of Comfort specializes in putting together care packages. The Sympathy Soup Gift Basket is a thoughtful way to send your deepest condolences. The basket includes:
- Four to six servings of soup (or mac n' cheese).
- Half a dozen Bacci rolls (or for a limited time and with certain soups bread bowls).
- Half a dozen cookies.
- A serving ladle.
- A card with a personal message containing sympathy words from you.
The Spoonful of Comfort Sympathy and Solace Care Package includes a Cozy Comfort throw, Healing After Loss book, Soothing tea trio, raw honey with a wooden dipper, half a dozen cookies, and a notecard with a personal message. Consider adding some religious sympathy messages to the notecard to help a loved one deal with their sorrow. Here are a few ideas for sympathy gifts.
Giving condolences does not necessarily need to be in a sympathy card. There are other ways to send your condolence message. For example, a text message, sympathy card, or telephone call could be thoughtful ways to share some comforting words and show someone they are in your thoughts and prayers.
